Hello <<First Name>>,
Is it OK to get angry?
That's the question from a recent discussion on Emotional Intelligence (EQ) I facilitated for a group of professional women. We were talking about how lack of Impulse Control is one of the EQ competencies that tends to derail successful people.
My answer--Heck, yeah! It’s OK to get angry.
Anger is one of our basic emotions. The "anger scale" ranges from Annoyance, to Hostility, into Anger and through to Rage and then Fury, according to Robert Plutchiks Theory of Basic Emotions.
Feeling angry is fine. What matters is what you do with it.
Acknowledging that you are angry--and why--is important to figuring out how you can use that feeling to resolve the issue and move forward.
What often happens is anger overwhelms our Impulse Control--thus the 'flamer' boss, the irate customer, the lashing out, the biting words, the shouting.
Many of us will be traveling for the holidays, leading to the 'perfect storm' scenario of high stress which can weaken our Impulse Control and allow our anger to erupt in non-productive ways.
Busy airport. Family in tow. Luggage, packages, winter weather gear. Flight cancellation. Aaaaaagggghhhh!
You immediately feel your anger rising and you want to lash out and yell at someone, blame someone, make someone else share your pain.
Before you become one of those irate passengers that everyone backs away from…let’s apply a little EQ to this.
What is making you angry?
Why is it making you angry?
Is impulsively acting on your anger-- shouting, being disruptive, lashing out-- going to resolve the problem?
What can you do to respond productively to the issue making you angry?
Is an assertive statement of anger needed to move things forward?
The key to Emotional Intelligence is gauging the appropriate way to deal with our emotions so they achieve positive outcomes.
How will you choose to use your anger?
And if you are feeling "too busy" to get any joy out of the season, you might try 30 Seconds to a Happier Holiday.
My best wishes,
Phone: 703-417-9411 (O) // 571-239-1483 (C)
To celebrate the holiday season and get you off to an empowered start in 2015, I am offering a “Give a Gift to Yourself” special through December—The EQ Leadership report with four hours of Leadership Coaching for $550 (a 25% savings).
To avoid overloading your “Stress Tolerance” EQ competency around holiday budgeting, you can even pay in two installments of $275, one in December and one in January. Call me @571-239-1483 or email for more information so you can make an informed decision.