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Love and Making It
Living a Brave and Beautiful Life in Bed and Out
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Let your body speak

Move. Touch. Caress. Grab. Combine. Lick. Suck. Brush. Smooth. Encircle. Cup. Warm. Tickle. Hurry. Meander. Explore. Discover.

How we touch speaks volumes without saying a word. 

Words spoken in love heal us.  We long to hear spoken words of forgiveness, encouragement, acceptance, and appreciation. Words that drip with passion whispered in an ear can melt our hearts. Words matter to us. But, we cannot live on words alone. Actions do speak in ways words cannot. 

 

There is something about words made flesh. 

 

Words made flesh: thoughts, words, ideals all made into tangible actions.


We need to be touched in ways that communicate the love we talk and think about -- and NOT in a shallow or obligatory way. No one dreams of hearing "I love you" from someone out of obligation or manipulation. In the same way, no one wants to be touched out of obligation or manipulation. Honest, heartfelt words that spring from unquenchable love and passion...? Those we want. Honest, heartfelt caresses that come from unquenchable love and passion...? Those we want.

When we only love with words, we are missing out on the bulk of communication with our partner. This is why sex is so important and special.

Experts say that at least 55% of communication is nonverbal.

  • What is your non-verbal communication saying to your spouse?


Researchers show that touch is vital to healthy emotional bonds, perceptions of safety, and the formation of identity.

  • What are your touches saying about the bond and identity of your marriage?


The part of the brain that interprets nonverbal communication is the amygdala. The amygdala also processes emotions, trustworthiness, fear, and pleasure. Do you see the direct connection? How we FEEL about someone is the processed in the same brain location where we process their nonverbal communication. 

Whether we easily enjoy sex or not, it is a vital component of bonding, emotional connection, and a healthy marriage. It is worth working on.

 

The You inside your body was designed to be affected by touch.  Loving caresses can heal the places that were wounded in the past, but sometimes the healing process hurts.  Scar tissue forms on our souls and the recovery demands attention. The knots in our spirit need deep tissue massage to get them out. This is why sex is sometimes a difficult thing to face, it is truly a physical therapy that effects our body and soul. Sex reunites us with our entire selves, if we let it. 

In the beginning, when you were first being formed as a human, your body and soul were as connected to each other as your fingers are connected to your hands, to your wrists. 

There is a conversation waiting to happen between your body and your lover.  It will begin with awkward late night talks - daring words of request and hope - but it will not end with words.  Allow the words to be made flesh in your bed. Allow your body and soul to reconnect through the practice of sex. 

Let his kisses say love.
Let his hands whisper hope.
Let his touches speak acceptance. 

Use your hands, lips, hips, and eyes to respond with desire, love, devotion, acceptance. 


Love the entire person and let your entire person be loved. The best way to love an entire person is with a combination of words and touch. You can speak all the love you want, but there is something about a loving hand caressing the perfect spot...

 

*****

Sex is so much bigger and wider in its purpose than we are taught.  It is not just for fun, not just an assignment, not just for procreation, not just a carnal hunger or obligation.  Sex is not just one act, but a collection of acts, movements, and intentions. Sex is a practice that can bring more wholeness, attention, and love to every part of our lives.

Sex is an entire language that reaches and heals every part of ourselves.  

*****

Thank you for being a part of Love and Making It. As we learn to be brave and free in bed and out, our entire lives change. Everything is connected. Don't give up on feeling attractive. Don't ever give up on your body or your partner. There's always more to try and learn. There's a lot of space here for whatever you need. Let's keep going.    -Nicolette
TELL YOUR FRIENDS. FORWARD THIS TO YOUR SPOUSE. 
PASSIONALS á GOGO: THE FREE NEWSLETTER 

Healthy | Fun | Free | Beautiful
Listen to your heart.

What do you need communicated to your body and soul?  

What do you want to communicate? 

It's time to have those awkward, wonderful conversations about how these movements matter and how those ones make me nervous but I want to do them too... 

If your lover is safe and trustworthy and loving, then it is time to let them use their body to massage the knots out of your soul.

Listen. We are bombarded with sights and sounds that tell us we are just not good enough and neither is our spouse. Let’s rebel against all of those messages together.

LOVE AND MAKING IT: REAL SEX. REAL LOVE. 
 
BRAVERY | BEAUTY | FREEDOM
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